8/16/2015

30DC: Weird Things You Do When You're Alone

Mightiest of Guns, A.A. Bondy

I found myself alone inside my alma mater one hot Saturday afternoon. I came from Dapitan to have a couple of things printed, and I couldn't resist taking out my trusty camera with just over a bar of juice remaining. I was home, but I was all alone.




I entered the campus and half-expected the guard to stop me. He didn't - he just checked me once over and went back to doing guardly things. I took a few tentative steps just to make sure, but hurried on nevertheless.

Walking along the old graduate office was pretty unsettling. I think I was so used to seeing white uniforms, seeing it deserted and quiet was, to be frank, quite weird. I whipped out my camera and started taking shots of what had changed, and what hadn't. I traced my steps around the church, and went to Nico's Tae Spot, just because. I wandered along the pavs across the field and dwelled on that one night sprawled on some kind of metal seating. I went outside and grabbed a few sticks of isaw and kwek kwek. I strolled through the shady canopy of trees between Lover's Lane and the field, and sidestepped across the arch of the centuries. I went back to Plaza Mayor and took a shot of the facade that had housed me all these years.

Then, the memories came to me in waves. I've always thought of memories that way - the further it recedes, the harder it feels when it inevitably comes smashing back into you. It was hard to be so near the place where all those things happened, and yet so far. I was in one plane, but not on the other.


I sat on a bench with a bit of shade and took it all in. Breathed it all out. Took it all in again.

Reconfiguring my place in the whole wide world. Thinking and overthinking, over and over again.

In some ways, people will not find this weird. But in this case, the weird I seek is the unnaturalness
of it all. On a typical Saturday, I'd be melting like butter on a pancake, fast asleep in my bed. Now, I'm still melting, but really, in quite a different sense.

To be able to immerse yourself freely in the ocean that is your thoughts is such a rare gift, and one that I am indeed thankful for.

I'm glad I did visit,

And I hope to see you again, soon.

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