A Couple of Things

XI. 

I feel helpless. 

It seems to me at this point that for the longest time, I was chasing goals. For the most part, I was meeting them - graduating, getting my license, getting into a career I liked, albeit with a few hiccups here and there. 

I feel like I really need to talk about what I am feeling. I'm studying right now, and part of that training is to be able to notice the distorted thinking of others, and how this thinking gets to affect how they behave. I know that one's experiences growing up can predispose them towards certain things, I do. For the most part in my training as a counselor, I felt that I was meeting them, you know? My goals, my work. I had a feeling that I was pretty okay doing this, that I was good and helping people out, you know? 

It's just hard.